Yesterday was my half birthday

[browngirl]

And I wanted very much to post something that really came from within me, as I did last year and again six months ago. All my writing comes from me (tautology, there) but it's more or less admixed with what I think people want to see. I really wanted to post a story that was purely about what I want to write.

I didn't have any such thing to post. I'm still writing, but I think my pace has slowed. I find myself feeling as if I'm letting someone down by that, but, really, this is all supposed to be about having fun. I have the unfortunate habit of beating myself when I think I'm not being productive, but I know from my childhood that being beaten, whether by my parents or internally by myself, makes me *less* productive, not more. If I can take the pressure off I can be more creative.

And that's quite enoutgh about the inside of my head. My point, and the reason I'm actually posting this, is that I think I'm not going to be writing as much as I used to. I'll still be writing, in both my fandoms, and I'll use the summer to write rough drafts of several longer things which I can then polish and post later. (Including some not-porn. Lately it seems all I post are drabbles and porn.) I've kept some stories back to have a semi-consistent level of output, but I think I'm just going to post them and let my output reflect how much I'm actually writing. I thought I should say something to this effect, so people know where I am as they consider their friends list lineups and so on.

Besides, if I'm writing less one thing I can do is read (and comment) more, which is doubtless a more socially useful thing for me to do anyway.

Comments

[claudia603.livejournal.com]

Well, the way I see it is that this is supposed to be fun, a break from the mundane and harsh reality of life. When I start feeling pressured by oh, I should finish this WIP or I should write this story I promised so-n-so, then it becomes not so fun and more work and I rebel. I end up wanting to write something else completely. Well, lately, I've just decided to go with that. If I want to write about Frodo and Aragorn living in a crack house in the Australian Outback, then I'm going to write that. People might be disappointed.

For example, in regards to feeling guilty about finishing WIPs...There are people who love to read WIPs just because it gives them pleasure to read that part of the story and they're not that attached to whether it ever gets finished or how long it takes (*raises hand*) and then there are those who don't read WIPs. Well, those same people who have told me that they'd read my stuff when it's no longer a WIP never come back and read it anyway, so I no longer worry about what anyone thinks anymore. In other words, I'm not going to cater to the folk that don't read WIPs because I don't think they'll read it anyway and those who enjoy reading WIP for the sake of reading WIPs are going to read it no matter how long it takes...:-D In other words, the best writing from me comes when it doesn't feel forced.

I'm sorry, I'm totally babbling :-D But I think you know what I mean...*hugs* Just do what you need to do to keep enjoying the process and seeing this as a pleasant escape.

[rubynye.livejournal.com]

*nod* Obeekaybee. :)

PS I love your icon!