Play, Parent, Punt (also known as...)

[browngirl]

I'm incredibly bored.

If I'd've been productive last night I'd have fic to post today, and I wouldn't be so damn bored. But I wasn't, so I don't, so I am. So I thought I'd play a game. The title is the kidsafe name a friend of mine gave the famous game known as

Shag, Marry, Cliff?

LOTR:

Denethor, Boromir, Faramir?
Sam, Merry, Pippin?
Estel, Thorongil, Elessar?
Gandalf, Saruman, Bombadil?
Arwen, Luthien, Galadriel?
Eomer, Eowyn, Theodred?
Grima, Witch King, Smeagol?
Gaffer Gamgee, Farmer Maggot, Robin Smallburrow?
Durin, Gimli, Thorin Oakenshield?
Gildor Inglorion, Legolas Greenleaf, Glorfindel? (book)
Legolas, Haldir, Figwit (movie)?
Halbarad, Beregond, Bergil (when he grows up)?


DC Comics:
Superman, Batman, Robin?
Robin I, Robin II, Robin III?
Nightwing, Robin III, Batman?
Nightwing, Officer Grayson, Dick the acrobat?
Batgirl III (Cass Cain), Spoiler, Huntress?
Green Arrow, Batman, Blue Beetle?
Batgirl I, Batgirl III, Batwoman?
John Stewart, Guy Gardner, Kyle Rayner?
Spoiler, Wonder Girl II, Arrowwette?
Starfire, Raven, Wonder Girl I?

Lois McMaster Bujold's works

Miles Vorkosigan, Bel Thorne, Ivan Vorpatril?
Alys Vorpatril, Cordelia Naismith, Drou Koudelka?
A quaddie, a herm, a ba?
Taura, Ellie Quinn, Ekaterin?
Admiral Naismith, Captain Vorkosigan, Miles?


Real Life

Peter Jackson, George Lucas, Steven Spielberg?
Viggo Mortensen, Sean Bean, Bernard Hill?
Halle Berry, Angelina Jolie, Julia Roberts?
Christian Bale, Michael Keaton, Adam West?
A Minoan, an Egyptian, a Sumerian?
Sir Ian McKellen, Christopher Lee, Ian Holm?
Ewan McGregor, Sir Alec Guinness, Samuel L. Jackson?
Sean Connery, Roger Moore, Pierce Brosnan?
George W Bush, Dick Cheney, John Ashcroft?

Comments

[claudia603.livejournal.com]

But...but...in LOTR. Where is Frodo? *looks around wildly* Where is he? *has withdrawal symptoms*

Denethor (cliff...oh, wait--that's movie!canon!), Boromir (shag), Faramir(marry)?
Sam (cliff), Merry (marry), Pippin (shag)?
Estel (shag), Thorongil (shag again), Elessar (marry and then shag again)?
Gandalf (marry), Saruman(cliff), Bombadil (shag)?
Arwen (cliff), Luthien (shag), Galadriel (marry)?
Eomer (marry), Eowyn (cliff), Theodred (shag)?
Grima (shag -- ew ew ew), Witch King (marry -- I guess :-o), Smeagol (cliff)?
Gaffer Gamgee (um...cliff), Farmer Maggot (marry), Robin Smallburrow (shag...hopefully he's hot)?
Durin (cliff), Gimli (marry), Thorin Oakenshield (shag)?
Gildor Inglorion (shag), Legolas Greenleaf (marry, omg, ima marysue), Glorfindel? (book) (cliff)
Legolas (cliff), Haldir (marry), Figwit (movie) (shag)?
Halbarad (<3 <3 <3 marry), Beregond (shag), Bergil (when he grows up) (cliff)

And that last one in the real life one? Just wrong. Just...just wrong...:-D

[rubynye.livejournal.com]

Well, there's no point in putting Frodo. He's utterly, wonderfully obvious. :)

[claudia603.livejournal.com]

Yup...shag him senseless or marry him. :-D Too delectable a choice.

[ilthit.livejournal.com]

Well, if you asked me and it was Frodo, Sam, Rosie, I'm afraid the Ringbearer might be taking a short flight...

[baranduin.livejournal.com]

LOTR:

Denethor, Boromir, Faramir? shag, shag, shag and marry
Sam, Merry, Pippin? cliff, shag and marry, cliff (assuming book-verse here!)
Estel, Thorongil, Elessar? marry, marry, shag
Gandalf, Saruman, Bombadil? cliff * 3
Arwen, Luthien, Galadriel? shag * 3
Eomer, Eowyn, Theodred? shag and marry, shag, shag
Grima, Witch King, Smeagol? cliff, shag and marry, cliff
Gaffer Gamgee, Farmer Maggot, Robin Smallburrow? cliff * 3
Durin, Gimli, Thorin Oakenshield? cliff * 3
Gildor Inglorion, Legolas Greenleaf, Glorfindel? (book) shag * 3
Legolas, Haldir, Figwit (movie)? cliff * 3
Halbarad, Beregond, Bergil (when he grows up)? shag and marry, shag, shag

Real Life

Peter Jackson, George Lucas, Steven Spielberg? shag and marry, cliff, cliff
Viggo Mortensen, Sean Bean, Bernard Hill? shag * 3
Halle Berry, Angelina Jolie, Julia Roberts? shag, shag, cliff
Christian Bale, Michael Keaton, Adam West? shag, cliff, cliff
A Minoan, an Egyptian, a Sumerian? shag * 3
Sir Ian McKellen, Christopher Lee, Ian Holm? shag, cliff, marry
Ewan McGregor, Sir Alec Guinness, Samuel L. Jackson? shag, cliff, cliff
Sean Connery, Roger Moore, Pierce Brosnan? shag, cliff, cliff
George W Bush, Dick Cheney, John Ashcroft? punt off the cliff * 1,000,000

[rubynye.livejournal.com]

*giggle* Yay, shaggeage

[browngirl.livejournal.com]

LOTR
Denethor, Boromir, Faramir? cliff, shag, marry.
Sam, Merry, Pippin? marry, shag at the same time.
Estel, Thorongil, Elessar? shag, cliff (he can survive it), marry. Much like Arwen did.
Gandalf, Saruman, Bombadil? Why did I ask this?
Arwen, Luthien, Galadriel? cliff, shag, marry (I adore Galadriel)
Eomer, Eowyn, Theodred? Cliff, shag, shag. No marrying here, I think. (obviously, a live Theodred.)
Grima, Witch King, Smeagol? Marry, shag, cliff (devous allies are good to have, and power is sexy.)
Gaffer Gamgee, Farmer Maggot, Robin Smallburrow? cliff, marry, shag (I always liked Robin.)
Durin, Gimli, Thorin Oakenshield? marry, shag, cliff (Thorin was a prat, and Gimli is a good sturdy prince but totally married to Legolas)
Gildor Inglorion, Legolas Greenleaf, Glorfindel? Marry, shag, shag
Legolas, Haldir, Figwit (movie)? Over the cliff, elves!
Halbarad, Beregond, Bergil (when he grows up)? Shag, lightly lowe over a cliff and pull back up, marry.


DC Comics:
Superman, Batman, Robin? Shag, cliff, marry
Robin I, Robin II, Robin III? Shag, shag, and, um, talk to for a long time? If I must cliff one, Dick will do best at landing safely.
Nightwing, Robin III, Batman? Shag, marry (or at least mother be Alfred), cliff.
Nightwing, Officer Grayson, Dick the acrobat? Shag, marry, cliff (but only because he'd land safely.)
Batgirl III (Cass Cain), Spoiler, Huntress? Shag, marry, cliff.
Green Arrow, Batman, Blue Beetle? Shag, cliff, marry till he divorced me to run off with Booster
Batgirl I, Batgirl III, Batwoman? Marry, shag, cliff.
John Stewart, Guy Gardner, Kyle Rayner? Marry, cliff, peg shag.
Spoiler, Wonder Girl II, Arrowwette? Shag, cliff (because she can fly), marry (or at least take away from her mom)
Starfire, Raven, Wonder Girl I? Shag, marry, cliff (because anyone who shags or marries her runs into trouble, don't they?)


Lois McMaster Bujold's works
Miles Vorkosigan, Bel Thorne, Ivan Vorpatril? Shag, marry, cliff.
Alys Vorpatril, Cordelia Naismith, Drou Koudelka? Cliff, shag, marry.
A quaddie, a herm, a ba? marry, shag, cliff.
Taura, Ellie Quinn, Ekaterin? cliff, shag, marry.
Admiral Naismith, Captain Vorkosigan, Miles? shag, cliff, marry. Much like Ekaterin did.


Real Life
Peter Jackson, George Lucas, Steven Spielberg? Shag, cliff, marry (and then cliff)
Viggo Mortensen, Sean Bean, Bernard Hill? cliff (the fangirls will catch him) shag (totally), marry (ooh)
Halle Berry, Angelina Jolie, Julia Roberts? marry, shag, cliff
Christian Bale, Michael Keaton, Adam West? shag, marry, take out for drinks.
A Minoan, an Egyptian, a Sumerian? You can guess, right? ;)
Sir Ian McKellen, Christopher Lee, Ian Holm? marry (and boywatch with), shag (and listen to him talk, oooh), cliff (over a hobbit sized cliff, so he'll be fine)
Ewan McGregor, Sir Alec Guinness, Samuel L. Jackson? shag, cliff, marry.
Sean Connery, Roger Moore, Pierce Brosnan? Shag, cliff, marry.
George W Bush, Dick Cheney, John Ashcroft? There aren't cliffs high enough, there really aren't.

[ilthit.livejournal.com]

Gandalf, Saruman, Bombadil? Why did I ask this?

*giggle* Well, Tom keeps Goldberry happy, so why not? And Gandalf's a doll, I wouldn't mind marrying him at all.

Gaffer Gamgee, Farmer Maggot, Robin Smallburrow? cliff, marry, shag (I always liked Robin.)

Farmer Maggot's dogs scare me!

Gimli is a good sturdy prince but totally married to Legolas

Hear, hear! I didn't think the exercise was about who THEY would marry, tho.

You would cliff Taura! Poor Taura! I always liked her best of all of Miles's girlfriends (unless you count Bel). Then again she'd have a good chance of surviving, even if you managed to throw her.

[danachan.livejournal.com]

I love you. ♥ And this was fun...
Denethor, Boromir, Faramir? shag cliff, shag, shag marry.
Sam, Merry, Pippin? become one part on an OT4
Estel, Thorongil, Elessar? shag, cliff, marry
Gandalf, Saruman, Bombadil? marry, cliff, ... cliff
Arwen, Luthien, Galadriel? shag x3
Eomer, Eowyn, Theodred? shag x3
Grima, Witch King, Smeagol? marry, shag, cliff
Gaffer Gamgee, Farmer Maggot, Robin Smallburrow? cliff, marry, shag
Durin, Gimli, Thorin Oakenshield? marry, shag, cliff
Gildor Inglorion, Legolas Greenleaf, Glorfindel? (book) shag x3
Legolas, Haldir, Figwit (movie)? cliff x3
Halbarad, Beregond, Bergil (when he grows up)? shag, shag, marry

[ilthit.livejournal.com]

Ooh, there's Vorkosigan there! Now I MUST play.

S: Faramir, M: Boromir, C: Denethor. Because: Faramir would probably be a considerate lovemate, but I prefer Boromir, and anyway he dies so I don't have to end up married for long, mwaha. And Denethor seems to like falling off cliffs.
S: Pippin, M: Sam, C: Merry. Sorry Mer, I had to choose one.
C: Estel, C: Thorongil, C: Elessar... Mwaha.
S: Bombadil, M: Gandalf, C: Saruman.
S: Arwen, M: Galadriel, C: Luthien. ...Because Liv!Arwen was hawt. Ahahaha, sorry Luthien, I know you're supposed to be cooler.
S: Theodred, M: Eowyn, C: Eomer.
S: Witch King, M: Grima, C: Smeagol.
S: Farmer Maggot, M: Robin Smallburrow, C: Gaffer Gamgee. I'd make a terrible daughter-in-law.
S: Thorin, M: GIMMUNS, C: Durin.
S: Glorfindel, M: Legsy, C: Gildor.
S: Figwit, M: Legolas, C: Haldir.
S: Halbarad, M: Bergil, C: Beregond (yep, still a terrible daughter in law).

S: Batman, M: Robin, C: Superman (he'll survive).
S: Robin II, M: Robin III, C: Robin I
S: Batman, M: Robin III, C: Nightwing
S: Officer Grayson, M: Dick the acrobat, C: Nightwing
Batgirl III (Cass Cain), Spoiler, Huntress - Can't answer that, since of those three I'm only familiar with Huntress, who's hawt.
Green Arrow, Batman, Blue Beetle - Can't answer that on account of not being familiar with Blue Beetle.
Batgirl I, Batgirl III, Batwoman - No friggin' clue. I'm only vaguely familiar with the one batgirl who, like, became the computer girl. Oracle, right?
John Stewart, Guy Gardner, Kyle Rayner - Who?
Spoiler, Wonder Girl II, Arrowwette - La la la you speak in strange tongues, woman.
Starfire, Raven, Wonder Girl I - Whoooo?

S: Miles Vorkosigan, M: Bel Thorne, C: Ivan Vorpatril, although that's cruel to poor Ivan, and on some days it might easily be S: Ivan, M: Bel, C: Miles.
S: Cordelia, M: Drou, C: Alys.
A quaddie, a herm, a ba - all I know I'd cliff the ba. Unless the ba was so fabulously wonderful I'd want to marry it, but that depends on the individual ba, and the baness would sort of be counted as a negative when contemplating marriage or shaggage, especially shaggage.
S: Elly, M: Taura, C: Ekaterin.
S: Admiral Naismith, M: Miles, C: Captain Vorkosigan

S: Peter Jackson, M: Peter Jackson, C: Steven Spielberg
S: Sean Bean, C: Viggo Mortensen, C: Bernard Hill - that seems cruel, but I couldn't marry either of them!
S: Angelina, C: Halle Berry, C: Julia Roberts - I cheat once more!
S: Christian Bale, M: Michael Keaton, C: Adam West. Sorry Adam!
A Minoan, an Egyptian, a Sumerian - insufficient data.
S: Ian Holm, M: Ian McKellen, C: Christopher Lee - *cringes* How awful! Throwing such a venerable actor off a cliff!
S: Samuel L. Jackson, M: Ewan McGregor, C: Sir Alec Guinness. Poor Alec Guinness!
S: Pierce Brosnan, M: Sean Connery, C: Roger Moore
George W Bush, Dick Cheney, John Ashcroft - fatal error please reboot universe.

[rubynye.livejournal.com]

*rotfl*
absolutely, *rotfl*

And yes, I'd cliff Taura, because she could survive it and because I'm with Mark when it comes to Miles' terrifying taste in women.

Batgirl I became Oracle the Computer Girl, as you put it.

[apple-pi.livejournal.com]

I've been meaning to do this for a while.

LOTR:

Denethor - cliff (duh), Boromir - shag (like bunnies, BUNNIES I tell you), Faramir - marry and make sweet, sweet love to. And when he gets tired I call Boromir again.
Sam - cliff (so sorry Sam I love you but you lose), Merry - marry (marry Merry, hee), Pippin - shag until we DIED. Then invite the hubby over for some posthumous threesomes.
Estel, Thorongil, Elessar? Ehm... Aren't Estel and Elessar the same people? And who is Thorongil? *is ashamed not to know*
Gandalf - marry (great voice and handy around the house with that whole lighting-fires-at-will thing), Saruman - cliff, Bombadil - shag (c'mon, Goldberry keeps him around for SOME reason)
Arwen - cliff (sorry sweetie: tragic, romantic, dull), Luthien - marry (you know she was a hottie, and she went on adventures and stuff), Galadriel - shag (mmmm, Galadriel)
Eomer - shag (with the helmet on please), Eowyn - marry (if she cheered up a wee bit), Theodred - cliff (destined for the cliff anyway, poor sod)
Grima, Witch King, Smeagol? THIS IS JUST SO WRONG. But I'd shag the Witch King.
Gaffer Gamgee, Farmer Maggot, Robin Smallburrow? YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED. Um. Bet Farmer Maggot's a good lay...
Durin - cliff cliff cliff, haughty old bugger, Gimli - marry (what? he's handy about the house), Thorin Oakenshield - shag then cliff, fucking Napoleon complex he's got
Gildor Inglorion - cliff (bad luck old boy), Legolas Greenleaf - shagadelic, Glorfindel - marry (bit more stable than Leggy methinks)
Legolas - marry (Haldir being so... meh), Haldir - shag (yeah, he's meh; he's still shaggable), Figwit - cliff (no idea who this is, lol)
Halbarad - shag oh yes yes YES, Beregond - marry (family man, delicious), Bergil (when he grows up) - aww, I wanna shag him too. Shag then cliff.

Real Life

Peter Jackson - marry, George Lucas - CLIFF. ONTO SHARP POINTY ROCKS, Steven Spielberg - shag (he's okay I guess)
Viggo Mortensen - shag (oh so much), Sean Bean - marry (and have sex ALL DAY EVERY DAY), Bernard Hill - cliff (sorry Bernie, y'know I love ya)
Halle Berry - shag (one of the most beautiful women in the world), Angelina Jolie - cliff (skanky), Julia Roberts - marry (cute laugh, seems nice. too tall for me, though)
Christian Bale - don't know him, but shag, what the hell, Michael Keaton - marry mmmmmmmm, Adam West - CLIFF
A Minoan, an Egyptian, a Sumerian? Um, yeah. I got nothin'. Marry a Minoan though, this woman's no fool, matriarchal society yespleasethankyou.
Sir Ian McKellen - marry (oh the witty banter at the breakfast table!), Christopher Lee - cliff (boring despite the beautiful voice), Ian Holm - shag (cute and small, just like I like 'em)
Ewan McGregor - marry and make him keep that beard forEVAH, Sir Alec Guinness - cliff (sorry Obi Wan), Samuel L. Jackson - shag (though he's scary. But I don't mind bottoming.)
Sean Connery - shag (after making him call all his ex-wives and lovers and apologise for being an ass), Roger Moore - cliff (sorry, I really do like you okay), Pierce Brosnan - marry and make him read me books.
George W Bush, Dick Cheney, John Ashcroft? WTF THIS IS SO WRONG. Okay but: George - marry AND MAKE HIS LIFE A LIVING HELL AHAHAHA AND PUBLICLY DECLARE MY BELIEF THAT MARIJUANA AND PROSITUTION SHOULD BE LEGAL AND GAY SEX IS TEH BOMB AND I WRITE IT ALL DAY AHAHAHAHA AND THEN DIVORCE HIM AND TAKE ALL HIS MONEY AND LEAVE HIM A HOMELESS BEGGAR ON THE STREETS OF DC. Yeah. Dick - cliff. OFF A BIG HIGH CLIFF ONTO POINTY SHARDS OF GLASS LIKE RAZOR BLADES. John - shag and then SELL THE STORY AND VIDEOTAPE TO EVERY NEWSPAPER IN THE WORLD.

That was fun. *beams*

[rubynye.livejournal.com]

Lord ha' mercy, oh, you made me roll around laughing. Your answers utterly rule.

Oh and Estel, Thorongil, Elessar? Ehm... Aren't Estel and Elessar the same people? And who is Thorongil? *is ashamed not to know*

They're all names/identities of Aragorn's, and that actually was the point of the (incredibly geeky) question.