The Vigil for Dr. Tiller

[browngirl]

How do I sum up this experience?



I could write about the uplifting parts -- the full church, the singing of "We shall not be moved" as we paced out of the sanctuary, the wonderful things I learned about Dr. Tiller as a really nifty-sounding human being, about the reproductive rights movement, about how brave thespian is. "Trust women," Dr. Tiller said, and on hearing (and seeing) those words last night, as a woman I felt very affirmed in my sentience and humanity.

I could write about what made me cry -- did I mention Thespian's courage? How brave the woman was who told us about her coathanger abortion? Or the former pro-life activist who stood up, told us that, and pledged herself to protecting abortion providers? Or those providers, several of whom stood up to speak? (All of whom were gray-haired. Apparently, fewer and fewer medical schools teach the procedure of an aborton, which is profoundly chilling.)

I could write about religion -- how oddly familiar it felt to bend my head for the prayers, the little speech Rev. Katherine Ragsdale gave explaining the choice of "A Mighty Fortress Is Our God", the way I thought of telling my parents that after years away I've attended a church service, and why. I'm not cruel enough for that last, though.

Then there were the bits that were, well, fun. Thespian leaning on me and being saucy about dripping wax. ceo spotting people (Thespian when we were gathering, qwwrty across the street). drglam, hammercock, cthulhia, beowabbit. Before everything, Red Ted getting me on the way, Tigerlily giving me candles and plates and hugs. And after everything, apparently, we were shown on Fox News at 10 last night. I hope I wasn't scratching my forehead. Or that I haven't just gotten the school in lots of trouble. But I digress.

And then there were so many striking details. Even in progressive Massachusetts, there were women and girls who faced such difficulties obtaining the abortion they needed, or found out late enough that their pregnancies were not viable, that they had to cross the country to go see Dr. Tiller. There will be women and girls in these same difficulties who won't be able to go to him, now and what will happen to them? And this, from one of the letters that was read: "[Dr. Tiller] encouraged us to hold our babies." I'm putting my reaction to that in spoiler text because it's rather graphic: highlight to read. When aborting these unviable babies, he had the skill and took the effort to keep the fetus' bodies intact, in order to give their parents bodies to grieve over and say goodbye to. Hardly the act of a murderer slaughtering babies for kicks.

I could write about our shared rage, our reminders to each other to not be daunted, that this is an ongoing and important struggle, but, well, you can probably guess. I have never forgotten how important control of our reproductive lives is to women's freedom, no matter how many women want to abdicate that freedom for themselves in order to strip it from others, but I was reminded all over again.

I don't think I can sum up such kaleidoscopic impressions into a cohesive linear post. Besides, having jotted this down, I next want to look forward, to go figure out what I can do to protect and forward reproductive freedom. We've got a lot of work to do.

Comments

[haddayr.livejournal.com]

THank you for sharing the information in white text about Dr. Tiller.

A friend of mine lost a child this way (she opted for inducing labor instead, but it's the same thing) and being able to hold her and say goodbye mattered so much. Dr. Tiller sounds like a wonderful doctor. Heartbreaking.