-- I love how Pike has all this guilt and discomfort and gets anxious about how Gaila feels about Starfleet and the Federation and Earth. I like that he's a good man, but still very much a product of his environment and his privilege. All of his reactions felt really believable to me, enough to be kind of uncomfortable without making him unsympathetic (i.e. not too close to the "Kirk can't tell one green girl from another" line. *wince*)
-- There is so much hotness! I love the way you describe the way Gaila moves. I want to take a bite out of her all over. And Pike too. I sort of flailed when she delivered the line about wanting to climb into his lap. :D
-- Gaila trying to be good and not hack into things! IDK why that kind of thing is like porn to me. I love it.
-- Is Gaila's dialect maybe a tiny bit Caribbean here? When she says "Too, too dry" in particular. I like the way if you put the sections in order you can see her diction and the way she carries herself changing. There is so much to be said about all the assimilation that must go on in Starfleet, and I am intrigued by the glimpses we see here.
-- But don't let that make it sound like I don't like the structure! I thought that it worked very well, and the ending is perfect, right where it is.
-- You are awesome at knowing when characters would call each other by their various names and titles, from "Ms Gaila" to "Mr. Gaila" to "Lieutenant Gaila," from "Chris" to "Christopher" to "Captain Pike" etc. I have a total fetish for that kind of detail. It reveals a lot about how people relate to each other. And in this story, it does a great job of showing the developing respect between them.
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Date: 2010-01-07 04:45 pm (UTC)-- I love how Pike has all this guilt and discomfort and gets anxious about how Gaila feels about Starfleet and the Federation and Earth. I like that he's a good man, but still very much a product of his environment and his privilege. All of his reactions felt really believable to me, enough to be kind of uncomfortable without making him unsympathetic (i.e. not too close to the "Kirk can't tell one green girl from another" line. *wince*)
-- There is so much hotness! I love the way you describe the way Gaila moves. I want to take a bite out of her all over. And Pike too. I sort of flailed when she delivered the line about wanting to climb into his lap. :D
-- Gaila trying to be good and not hack into things! IDK why that kind of thing is like porn to me. I love it.
-- Is Gaila's dialect maybe a tiny bit Caribbean here? When she says "Too, too dry" in particular. I like the way if you put the sections in order you can see her diction and the way she carries herself changing. There is so much to be said about all the assimilation that must go on in Starfleet, and I am intrigued by the glimpses we see here.
-- But don't let that make it sound like I don't like the structure! I thought that it worked very well, and the ending is perfect, right where it is.
-- You are awesome at knowing when characters would call each other by their various names and titles, from "Ms Gaila" to "Mr. Gaila" to "Lieutenant Gaila," from "Chris" to "Christopher" to "Captain Pike" etc. I have a total fetish for that kind of detail. It reveals a lot about how people relate to each other. And in this story, it does a great job of showing the developing respect between them.
Yay for ladies_1st! And yay for this fandom. <3